The Phantom by El Osas Iyalekhue : A Dramatic Magnification of Woes of Thespian Gentlemen and Women…

In painting the images that came alive in my recently staged play, The Phantom, I had set out to say many things, but I ended up saying many more things. My play The Phantom takes shape through Marxist Ideo-aesthetics, but the virtue caught in the text is not of a struggle between the rich and the poor or conflict born out of class struggle as a result of wealth distribution. No, I went further to place the personality of the Theatre artist as the underprivileged class whom society continues to subjugate, out of pessimism against what it can yield or a total lack of understanding of what theatrical artistry stands to represent.

My inspiration was born out of my experience during my undergraduate years in University of Jos, where a mention of oneself as a student of dramatic arts made the asker recoil as if something was mortally wrong with being a Theatre artist.  

A confused many, see Theatre professionals as a set of non-achievers. More pitiable is the fact that Theatre is under-supported in Nigeria, an almost a forgotten culture.  While other professional spheres continue to enjoy government patronage, we continue to experience a no-support attention from one Government regime to another.   The epitome of it was when erstwhile president Olusegun Obasanjo, of course a goon to his bones called for the scrapping of some courses from our higher institutions, and definitely he included Theatre Arts;  mostly because of abject intellectual poverty.  But thanks to media critics whose unreserved tongue lashing reminded OBJ of his bush understanding of Theatreand its relevance to society. The critics of course quickly educated OBJ about the role Theatre played in helping Nigeria beat the grips of colonialism and the rest, and the rest. 

Obasanjo’s foolery is  not restricted to presidential goons alone, most of our professional elites bask in the foolishness of believing that Theatre is not a serious venture. The Phantom captures the bleak realities of the Theatre Artiste and artists generally.

In a thematic irony however, the play also attempts to interrogate the role which the Theatre Artist plays in changing societal notion about us.  We cannot continue to run to the sphere of film and ignore staging, and yet pray to be heard; that itself is fighting for a course your hardly believe in. the Phantom also reminds Theatre Artistes that we must do more than just criticize the Government of the day about their negligence to what we do, but employ measures to expose and sell our arts to new consumers, while rebuilding the culture of live Theatre in Nigeria.

THE PHANTOM

Summary:

The Phantom is story about seven Theatre Artistes who work at a drama bar named  

DESTINATION UTOPIA.  Their responsibility is to lure in unsuspecting customers and kill them as revenge for society’s victimization of the Theatre Artist. These killing session run under the auspice of their director whom they refer to as the Choregus, becomes a ritual for them. Their prerogative is to force society to change their stance toward the Theatre Artist. The Theatre Artists in Destination Utopia continue to refer to the biblical Armageddon, in this light, other professional elites seen as agents of darkness, while them,  children of light and creativity.

In a plot twist, the Choregus has left a letter in the locker of the stage manager, Cece. The letter contains a New Vision, advising the artistes to refrain from killing customers, but rather initiate them into performance rituals.  The artistes are broken by the Director’s new stance, but Cece convinces them to share in the New Vision of Director the Choregus.

While Director’s New Vision is still trying to settle in at the bar, three customers present themselves, one of them a doctor whom Naomi has had a bitter encounter with as an artist. She tries hard to fight her will against killing the doctor. This stirs a conflict among the artists who are now divided between Naomi’s line and that of the director.  As Naomi tries hard to attack the customers, the others make her act to seem like a mere performance for entertainment at the bar. The unsuspecting customers however do not escape her charmed powder which she blows on them, turning them into statues as she exits.  This provokes Mellow and Cece, but the others take pleasure in exposing the nakedness of the customers, while pointing out what feeds the theme of the play, which is how society relates with the artistes. 

We are soon to find out; as Naomi returns that her father through the advice of the doctor had stopped her from studying dramatic arts, which she portrays as a taking advantage of her virgin years. The others who are touched by her story soon begin to reiterate personal experience of how society has treated them as artistes.  In a dramatic twist, they agree to drink the blood of the doctor and his companions, but Cece whose bitter experience helped her attain stage manager wards them off.  She promises them that she has far better reason s to want the blood of the customers, but that the Director’s New Vision must stand, for change to come. Tempers are lowered; Naomi releases the customers from her spell. But now, the doctor’s sister, Jemima has stung Cece about her singleness at forty, pointing out that actors are wayward people. Cece who has been the pacifist stabs Jemima in the abdomen, a tragedy. But surprisingly, it is a performance trick. She is not dead. The customers impressed, supply themselves for an initiation, and become protagonists for drama. 

EXCERPT FROM THE PHANTOM

(Although The Phantom was staged on a third draft, here are excerpts from the first draft.)

Excerpt 1

CECE: Enough of the entertainment…

More grunts.

CECE: the Director left a message in my closet…oh my God.

SILENCE

MELLOW: What is the grievance this time?

MISS WATERS: is there a problem?

SILENCE

MARIA: this is not a funeral…for Christ sakes, speak…

SILENCE

FIDOSI: Cece!

CECE:   Okay, let’s hear from the horse’s mouth… 

She brandishes a hand written letter, her hands shaking as she peers into the paper.

KIMONO: what is this?

NAOMI: read the bad news for Christ sakes…

CECE:  When did I say it was a bad news?

MELLOW: but you are shaking like a jelly

MARIA: what sort of Jelly?

MISS WATERS:  can we debate about the jelly some other time? Please tell us

              the news, good or bad…

Cece peers into the paper, her hands wobbling. Maria snatches the paper. Miss Waters in turn snatch the paper off her hand. She takes centre stage, everyone stretches to listen to her.

MISS WATERS: We have arrived at some certain truth…if we must spread the

              word, we must recruit a guerrilla battalion, foot soldiers to do

             the dirty job. Bloodletting will not change our position in

             this fight. Armageddon is coming and we need an army to fight

            the oncoming darkness (she pauses in surprise).

CECE:       waters hold your peace! (She heads for the letter but the others

           stop Her) for shit sakes! 

SILENCE

MISS WATERS: Lure them in, sell alcohol to them at very cheap price, and 

            mingle with them freely, spare their lives today, rather

            initiate them and send them out to lure more of our opposition.  

            Blood for blood, yes, but this will bring peace, and men to fight

           on our side when Armageddon comes. Hagia Sophia.

FIDOSI:    Sophia!

NAOMI:     peace?

KIMONO :  we, children of light…mingle freely with darklins? This whole thing

         is giving me an ulcer. 

MELLOW:   this is sabotage, a sellout, yet he calls it Hagia Sophia, Sophia!

NAOMI:   every one with an argument these days calls it Sophia!

MISS WATERS: infatuation! It is in their heads…this Sophia will bring a heart

            break…I swear it on Shakespeare’s grave, Director is making a

           mistake.

 CECE:       we must be patient and think deeply about this Sophia…she may be

           the light of our struggle…

MARIA: rubbish! Blood is what we set out to draw until they are forced to

       listen to us…on or before Armageddon.

KIMONO: after the late nights of staying awake to plan on how to carry out

         surprise attacks, we are now forced to pursue peace by initiation.

        This was meant to be a revolution…

MELLOW: after all the enemies we have made and stood off? Peace? Whose life

        is he planning to ruin? Me? I am not cut out for this.

NAOMI:  hey, director is still our divine chosen leader, we should not be

        hasty in dismissing his evaluation,

FIDOSI: evaluation? After all our sacrifices? Do you know how of us have

        died? Do you know tough it is to live in this bar everyday pretending

       to be a beer seller?

CECE:  you all have a point…but Director is still the Choregus, what he says

       Matters…he has never led us astray.

MISS WATERS: that is quite true…

SILENCE

MARIA: he better not be wrong this time.

KIMONO: hmmm 

Cece walks in again carrying a Ghana Must Go bag, full of performance paraphernalia. 

CECE: we better get into our costumes, or rather put on just accessories ,

      after all, it is only an initiation…Miss Waters please help us with

      makeup. Let’s not forget our props…Director will be

     here soon. Let’s do the job before he comes. I don’t want palaver…(the

     actors throw on a few accessories)

Maria has suddenly gotten over excited.

MARIA: two anti-Choregus agents are coming…

Cece snatches the binoculars off Maria’s neck. She peers through it.

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Excerpt 2

 When her dance comes to an end, the two blind sisters get overly excited.

MEENA: you know one time, I used to dream of being a dancer.

NAOMI : how can you dream when you are blind?

CECE: (pulling Naomi away)seriously if you ruin this for us, I will spill

       your blood by my own hands.

JEMAIMA: what gibberish explanation would you give this time to explain her

        utterance.

CECE: it isn’t gibberish, what Naomi here is doing, is reenacting the life of

     a tragic hero who is set out to achieve an aim, but she has a self

     invented tragic flaw that would lead to her eventual downfall. That is

     what we call hermatia…the tragic hero is usually hubristic…full of

     pride, (eyeing her) like Naomi here. Hubris and hermatia, are motor ways

    to tragedy and tragedy corrects the excesses of man.

MERRY: brilliant, you artistes are brilliant, even though I don’t really

       understand the concept of hubris and hermatia.

KIMONO: it’s Greek…the earliest Protagonists were recorded in Greek history.

        From Thespis to Oedipus…

JEMAIMA: you guys know about Greeks?

MISS WATERS: what does that mean…how the hell do you perceive us artistes?

JEMAIMA: I just didn’t think performance had anything to do with Greeks.

NAOMI: nobody said this was a performance…this is a bloody initiation,

       Your bloody initiation.

Merry and his sisters are frightened. Kimono goes into a fit of laughter.

KIMONO: he fell for it…he believed you…

FIDOSI: he is chicken hearted…

MERRY: you actors are a handful

MEENA: they are stinky and rude…

MERRY: shut up, you two!

JEMAIMA: well, you guys got me with your act…I actually thought she was

         serious.

NAOMI: (almost joking) well I wasn’t joking…when I get the right reason, I

       Will stick you…

CECE: I see you are having merry Mr Merry.

MERRY: I see why you call this place destination utopia. It is poetic.

       You drama people aren’t as pathetic as I thought…

Naomi head for him in fury, producing a little guard from which pours black powder into her palm. She blows it at Merry and his sisters. they freeze. The others express a collective fear.

CECE: what did you do that for? They were just beginning to warm up to our

      Performances.

MELLOW:  (pulling a knife) this is a misuse of spiritual power, why would you

        blow the dark powder of the Choregus on them? That is a privilege for

        Director  alone. He is the author of this ritual, it is his drama and

        not yours. Tame your violent creative impulse to kill or we shall

       force you  to  commit suicide…do not put death to test, you leftist

       zealot. If you need me to refresh your mind, this is an ideo-

       philosophy free Zone.

NAOMI: by attacking my leftist heritage, aren’t you being philosophical

       To the right?

MELLOW: ( menacingly) don’t push me with your unrealistic leftist style

         Criticism.

NAOMI: I see all you are trying to do is wield power…the ever so righteous

       Rightist seeking to oppress even when there is no need for oppression.

       Everything is about your interest…this not about Director, you

       Are after interest, the little change he hands to you for keeping an

       Eye over the sales, so stop acting like you could die for him. Before

      this darklins came in here, you almost crucified Director for

      suggestion an initiation ritual ( she hisses, and heads backstage).

KIMONO: she has to free them from her dark spell…

MISS WATERS: give her some time…let’s have fun for the main time.

MARIA: Let’s uncover their nakedness…

FIDOSI: This is going to be my best evening in a longest time.

CECE: please let’s not be vulgar before someone in the audience takes you

      seriously. Please let’s be modest.

Maria searches through Merry’s back pocket, brandishing a wallet. She searches out an I.D card which hands to Miss Waters.

MISS WATERS:  the elite national hospital, Abuja, Nigeria.

MARIA: what is he doing in Calabar?

KIMONO: who cares? These elites are the same everywhere.

FIDOSI: so he is a doctor?

KIMONO: doctors who can’t treat their own minds…

MISS WATERS: you can’t blame them, the heads of the elite say they are the

           most important class, they save lives.

MELLOW: life is not about living alone, it’s about experiences. The enjoyment 

        Of its pleasures, that caresses our minds, liked poetry, the

        enjoyment of creativity. Rock, Afrojuju, rap, r n b, television,

        film, we feed life with pleasures, without which, life would have

        been boring.

FIDOSI:  doctors are not that enlightened. This one looks particularly

         Annoying.

MARIA: can we see his anus?

KIMONO: why his anus?

MARIA: Just help me turn him around…

They move Merry  around until is buttock faces the audience. Maria gets a pair magnifying glass viewing his buttocks through it.

CECE: the anus of a doctor, it is not that different from that of the rest of

        us.

MARIA: I knew it…

MISS WATERS: were it not for Director, I would have enjoyed his blood.

            Doctors are fools, and I hate them.

MELLOW: who doesn’t hate doctors? They are the most impolite set of elites

        Them and their nurses…the way they deal with their patient is as of

       one dealing with lesser human beings. I have had my own fair share of

       such experiences.

FIDOSI: that is not my own grievance with them. It is the way they kill 

       patients every day, either out of negligence or sheer lack of

       professional experience. Cut and join medicine.

KIMONO: a woman died recently in my neighborhood, common appendix operation,

       they forgot a scissors in her stomach…the woman died and no one got

       sued or fired for malpractice.

MISS WATERS: sued for malpractice? Nigerians don’t know much about their

            Bloody rights.

MELLOW: That is not the problem…the problem is that most Nigerians think it

       is a doctor’s right to kill them.

CECE: but they are not all bad…

FIDOSI: not all bad how? In other professions, one bad fruit spoils the

        bunch, with doctors it’s the other way round.

CECE: that is an exaggeration…

MARIA: I am done, we may return him.

They return Merry to his earlier position. Maria searches through Jemaima’s  handbag, she retrieves an I D card, which she hands to Miss Waters. 

MISS WATERS: Banker…

FIDOSI: another set of rude elites…like doctors, they all need to get human

       relation education.

CECE: (to Mellow) enough of all this, get Naomi to release them from her

       spell…

MELLOW: why me?

CECE: because you two need to sort out your differences before we

      Continue the initiation…

MISS WATERS: she has a point…

KIMONO: we don’t want these potential initiates thinking we are divided.

        It is bad for the struggle…

FIDOSI: that is Sophia…wisdom!

MELLOW: but the girl has a devilish anger, she is eager to drink blood.

        Before now, she was the same person speaking for Director the

        Choregus. Why the sudden change?

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Excerpt 3

JEMAIMA: you seem to be the only sane person in here…

CECE: oh no…we are all sane people… (she serves them)

MERRY: are you married?

JEMAIMA: she must have a man…

CECE: Man? No man in my life…

JEMAIMA: aren’t you close to forty? And you are still not married?

MISS WATERS: don’t ask her that…

CECE: it’s okay…

JEMAIMA: you ought to dump this worthless acting profession lest no man will

       take you seriously.

MELLOW: don’t speak to her like that…

JEMAIMA: oh you shut up…the customer is always right…

CECE: It is okay…

JEMAIMA: well I could never let my brother here marry a worthless actor…

         It never really ends well…broken homes and all that…

The actors begin to show overt anger…

MARIA: watch your mouth…

MEERY : leave the lady alone…

But Cece has picked a knife from the costume bag, she rushed to Jemaima and stabs her in the stomach, blood dripping from her stomach unto the floor.

Shock takes over.

MERRY: what have you done? You have killed my sister…

But Cece begins to laugh hysterically.

CECE: she thought I actually stabbed her…it is only a performance trick.

THE PHANTOM

Crew:

Executive Producer: Joan Okon

                                   El Osas Iyalekhue

Director/writer:          El Osas Iyalekhue

Producer:                   Tolulope Odebunmi

Stage Manager           Joy Egba

Set/props:                  Charles John

Prompter:                   Savage Michael

Box Office:                Alice Ikpi/ Okokon Mesembe

Cast:

1.      Tolulope Odebunmi as  Merry

2.      Joy Egba as Mellow

3.      Excellence Ita as Kimono

4.      Naomi El as Naomi

5.      Deborah Waters as Miss Waters

6.      Queenette Hogan as Fidosi

7.      Cece Nathaniel as Cece

8.      Blessing Akpan as Jack Sparrow

9.      Chika Flourish as Meena

10.  Jemima Michaels

Staged 520 kolanut Centre, Barracks Road Calabar, Cross River State, Nigeria.